Posted by jetdoc on September 26th, 2011
Apologies for the late and rather hurried posting — I had this scheduled for yesterday, but got somewhat sidetracked.
|1||SWISS ROLL||National spin — a piece of cake!
SWISS = National; ROLL = spin
|6||DIPSO||Piss-artist pickpockets getting sod all
DIPS = pickpockets; O = sod all (nothing)
|10||DISARM||“Miliband ultimately exists”: member, to allay doubt and suspicion
D = Miliband ultimately; IS = exists; ARM = member
|11||MEDICATE||Dice cast when pressed by sexual partner to give someone a dose
*(dice); in (pressed by) MATE = sexual partner
|12/30/29||BROKEN DOWN BY AGE AND SEX||As a number of coed pupils, say, might undergo analysis just like Keith Richards?
Pupils in a co-educational school might be grouped along these lines. A different kind of line might have contributed as much as age and sex to Keith Richards’ condition.
|13/23||HAND BALL||Duke and Labour politician getting end away — foul!
HAND = duke (a word for a fist); Ed BALL[s] = Labour politician without his last letter. A foul in football
|14||RUMSFELD||Hawk-like Donald Duck’s head after drink and self mutilation
RUM = drink; *(self); D = Donald’s head. ‘Hawk-like Donald’ is the definition. That quote in full: “There are known knowns. These are things we know that we know. There are known unknowns. That is to say, there are things that we know we don’t know. But there are also unknown unknowns. There are things we don’t know we don’t know.”
|17||SKODA||A date gives agreement to be taken the other way in much abused car
A D OKS, reversed
|19||DRAKE||Lecher after head from dirty old seafarer
D = head from dirty; RAKE = lecher. Sir Francis Drake
|21||GLASS EYE||Ageless surgery involves ultimate in willy organ replacement (non-functioning)
*(Ageless Y), with ‘surgery’ as the anagram indicator, and Y indicated by ‘ultimate in willy’. A glass eye is a non-functioning organ replacement.
|25||THINK ALOUD||Fine with Nick’s end? Granted broadcast, say what’s on your mind
THIN = Fine; K = Nick’s end; ALOUD sounds like ‘allowed’, with ‘broadcast’ as the homophone indicator.
|28||BLOWHOLE||Balls at first down by orifice: this produces a whale of a watery ejaculation
B = Balls at first; LOW = down; HOLE = orifice. Whales breathe via blowholes; baleen whales have two and toothed whales have one. These are located on the top of the head, allowing the animal to remain mostly submerged whilst breathing. Breathing involves expelling excess water from the blowhole, forming an upward spout, followed by inhaling air into the lungs. Spout shapes differ among species and can help with identification.
|31||BLADDERED||Black hole generated in tights? Quite singular tights!
I am not sure about this one. B = Black; LADDERED = hole generated in tights. But it’s an adjective meaning ‘drunk’ or ‘tight’; removing S from ‘tights’ doesn’t make an adjective. Maybe someone can give a more sensible explanation that I have missed.
|2||WHIP-ROUND||Off-the-cuff taking of donations — party official gets the bullet?
WHIP = party official; ROUND = bullet
|3||SWANK||Show off direction on organ fingering
S = direction (south); WANK = organ fingering
|4||ROMANCE||Cameron’s dodgy relationship
|5||LIMBO||Dated dumb female totty with new top, attaining oblivion
[B]IMBO = dumb female totty (I’m not sure why it’s ‘dated’; I think the word is still in common usage), with a new first letter
|7||IN CAHOOTS||Old South Americans stifle a real laugh working together
INCAS = Old South Americans; containing A HOOT = a real laugh
|8||SATAN||Nick, like, upset Brown
AS = like, reversed; TAN = Brown. Old Nick is a term for the Devil.
|9||ADONIS||A party indiscretion, elevating “pretty boy”
A DO = a party; SIN, reversed. Adonis
|15||SCALLYWAG||Good-for-nothing Wally, wasted, in the grip of heroin
*(Wally); in SCAG = heroin
|16/20||DOG EAT DOG||When boxer has to take a bite of another boxer that really is competitive?
Implied double meaning of ‘boxer’
|18||AS YOU WERE||Arse around taking solvers (Private Eye) back to one’s earlier activity
*(Arse); around YOU = solvers, WE = Private Eye; ‘back to one’s earlier activity’ is the definition.
|22||AWKWARD||After a short period, division in constituency — embarrassing
A WK = a week, abbreviated; WARD = division in (parliamentary) constituency
|24||ALLEY||One to roar up back passage?
A YELL, reversed
|26||IDEAL||Thought by Labour’s leader “This is as good as it gets”
IDEA = Thought; L = Labour’s leader
|27||LEDGE||Balls pressed by leg, grotesquely, causing protrusion
ED (Balls) in *(leg)
I might get round to adding a joke later (if Donald Rumsfeld isn’t enough of one on his own).
OK: The barman says: “We don’t serve neutrinos”. A neutrino goes into a bar.