Fifteensquared

Never knowingly undersolved.

Cyclops 454: Did you have a luvvie-ly time?

Posted by jetdoc on January 8th, 2012

jetdoc.

Here’s hoping you all had a splendid time over the holidays, and wishing you a very happy and (cruciverbally, at the very least) successful 2012.

This blog is due to appear for tomorrow morning, but we’re well past the submit-by date, and you may want to have a look while it’s still the weekend and before it fades from memory.

With a plethora of Christmas puzzles awaiting me, I managed to finish this one (clue solving, at least), fortunately, in one session in the pub the afternoon before Christmas Eve. The blogging proved slightly more time-consuming. Revealed around the perimeter is a quote from Daniel Day-Lewis, which I give you in all its unexpurgated glory:

“There’s a terrible sadness. The last day of shooting is surreal. Your mind, your body, your spirit are not in any way prepared to accept that this experience is coming to an end. In the months that follow the finish of a film, you feel profound emptiness. You’ve devoted so much of your time to unleashing, in an unconscious way, some sort of spiritual turmoil, and even if it’s uncomfortable, no part of you wishes to leave that character behind. The sense of bereavement is such that it can take years before you can put it to rest.”

I confess that I googled this once I had worked out a few of the words; well done to those of you who painstakingly pieced it together from the available letters. The edited version would, strictly speaking, have “…this experience’s coming to an end.”

For anyone unfamiliar with the terminology used in these blogs, ‘*(abcdef)’ means ‘an anagram of abcdef’.

Across
13 NOOSE Swinger’s ropey neck wear?
The rope from whereby (wherefrom?) someone might hang
14 ROUGH Yobbish Archer finally has love — that’s horrible!
R = Archer finally; O = love; UGH = “that’s horrible!”
15 ROGUE Bugger gets goer (pissed) to eat top of underpants
*(goer), with ‘(pissed)’ as the anagram indicator; U = top of underpants
16 SATIRICAL Just like the Eye, rubbishing A-list celeb’s superior air
*(A-list C air), C being ‘celeb’s superior’
17 NABOKOV Fancy a bonk? Ring very controversial writer
*(a bonk O V), O being ‘ring’, and V being short for ‘very’
Vladimir Vladimirovich Nabokov
18 TULIP Length’s out, pull it frantically, flower!
Anagram of ‘pull it’ without L
19 NAMIBIA Country rejected one independent, sexually not fussy bloke
A = one; I = independent; BI = sexually not fussy; MAN = bloke; all reversed
20 SPIRO WASP ironically embracing Richard’s disgraced colleague
Hidden in ‘WASP ironically’
Spiro Agnew, 39th Vice President of the United States (1969–1973), serving under President Richard Nixon
21 OFTEN Go limp, pointlessly and frequently
[s]OFTEN, with ‘pointlessly’ meaning ‘take the S off’ (though if it were really without compass points, you’d be left with just OFT)
22 PRIORITY It’s most important to execute one intervening in Tory rip-off
*(I Tory rip), with ‘off’ as the anagram indicator
23 POETS CORNER Memorable Westminster location of circle involved with secret porn
*(O secret porn)
Poets’ Corner
26 GUNPOWDER PLOT Breaking up, Labour’s leader, Gordon wept: it failed to elevate parliament
*(up L Gordon wept)
The Gunpowder Plot, which did not result in Parliament being blown up
28 BULLDOG Balls to follow, pet?
BULL[shit] = balls; DOG = follow
29 HANOI City’s expression of triumph: “Charge reversed!”
HA = expression of triumph; ION = charge (strictly speaking, a charged particle), reversed
31 ITEMISE Record that is about Times being crappy
IE = that is; *(Times)
32/59 DANIEL DAY-LEWIS Being affected, is a wally indeed
*(is a wally indeed). No definition (though maybe it’s an &lit), as indicated by the preamble — this gives us the originator of the quotation.
34 REINTERRED Fancy, er, Lewinsky, say, getting end away, embarrassed to be put under again
*(er inter), Monica Lewinsky being an example of an intern, which has had its final letter removed; in RED = embarrassed. Definition: ‘put under again’
38 OUBLIETTE Blue tit mangled in old English prison down under
*(Blue tit OE)
An underground dungeon
40 MAINTENANCE Conservative activity: providing for one’s ex
Double definition, with ‘conservative’ in the non-political sense
41 LIMBO Where to send the unwanted member (Tories’ no. 2)
LIMB = member; O = Tories’ no. 2. Definition: ‘Where to send the unwanted’
Without involving Spotify, I couldn’t find a link to an actual performance of the excellent Kirsty MacColl track Dancing in Limbo; there’s also a reference in Blackadder Goes Forth
42 ETHOS Characteristic morality of those screwing around
*(those)
43 HANDCUFFING Police action to maintain close personal contact with the criminal?
Self-explanatory
44 STRETCHER Support for oil painting of Maggie, no hat, after rest disturbed?
*(rest); T[hat]CHER (hiss! boo!)
46 NINCOMPOOP Clinton finally abandoned Monica without a shit — plonker
N = Clinton finally; *(Monic) = abandoned Monica without A; POOP = shit
48 BLIGHT Brown, leader-wise, no heavyweight — “Blast!”
B = Brown, leader-wise; LIGHT = no heavyweight
49 FALLS TO Becomes the responsibility of sot, pissed after Autumn
FALL = Autumn; *(sot)
53 INSET Something stuck in the guts of Dawkins, etc.
Hidden in ‘Dawkins, etc.’
54 CUTTERS Those who pointedly ignore Conservative out-and-out bollocks finally
C = Conservative; UTTER = out-and-out; S = bollocks finally
56 PHYSIOTHERAPY Treatment of worried Tories happy to restrict Home Secretary’s extremes
HY = Home Secretary’s extremes; in *(Tories happy)
57 EXPECTORANT Await Obama’s opening diatribe — makes you want to spit!
EXPECT = Await; O = Obama’s opening; RANT = diatribe
61 GECKO Cold-blooded creature, lots of money and coke problem
G = lots of money; *(coke)
Gecko
63 X-RAYS Ten pointless years screwing around — they reveal the inner person
X = Ten; *(yars) = pointless years screwing around
65 DROP OFF Decline is proof nuts protected by ’Defender of the Faith’
*(proof); in DF = Defender of the Faith
66 HEATH Hard on the spin surrounding a former PM
H = hard; THE, reversed; A
67 CRAWLER After stroke, Brenda’s OBN candidate
CRAWL = a swimming stroke; ER = Brenda (the Queen, in Private Eye-speak)
68 STAIRLIFT It requires no effort to go up to bed tail first for screwing
*(tail first)
69 TILED House, at the very top, might be inflamed about Miliband?
LIT = inflamed, reversed; ED Miliband
70 TABLE Put forward, Balls’ first to get caught in lie
B = Balls’ first; in TALE = lie
71 DIG UP Get dirt on police officer, perverted ugly beast
DI = police officer (Detective Inspector); PUG, reversed = ‘perverted ugly beast’
Down
1 EXORBITANCE Bax composed with erection — that’s outrageous!
*(Bax erection)
2 A WEEK IN POLITICS Long time at Westminster? One gets feeble-sounding, as Cameron, Clegg, etc. are
A = One; WEEK = “weak”, i.e. feeble-sounding; IN POLITICS = as Cameron, Clegg, etc. are
Based on a quotation from Harold Wilson
3 THRIVE To succeed, Rev. Tony’s opening “Hi” needs a spin
*(Rev T Hi)
4 ADULTERERS Brenda doubled up between mature, short deceptive shaggers
ER ER = Brenda (the Queen) doubled up; ADULT = mature
5 OTHELLO To upset celebrity arse-licking mag would be a tragedy
OT = ‘to’ reversed; HELLO magazine
6 SORE POINT Maybe a chafed nipple is something you don’t want to discuss?
Double definition
7 ORGANDY In US, fine material stiffened penis possibly with good lengthy climaxes
ORGAN = penis possibly; with DY = gooD lengthY climaxes. Classic Cyclops style!
8 THERMOPILE Temperature sensor the Marines attached to ring on a singular pain in the arse
THE R[oyal] M[arines]; O = ring; PILE = a singular haemorrhoid
9 NOSEBLEED Beak’s outpouring: “Negative Coe wants the city to drop east end”
NO SEB = Negative Coe; LEED[s]
10 INTRANSIGENCE Bad sign: in an erect, inflexible state
*(sign: in an erect)
11 SERBS Sabre-rattling Pole abandons a European people at war not long ago
*(sbre S) — A is taken out of ‘sabre’, S = south pole
12 RUCTION No sex with dog raised stink
NO IT CUR, all reversed
24 OCHRE Murdoch resents accommodating wishy-washy Brown?
Hidden in ‘Murdoch resents’
25 ADVENT Clap perversely in a short show, etc., as a lead up to Christmas
VD, reversed = clap perversely; in A ENT[ertainment]
27 LADY MUCK Pretentious snob finds Gladys extremely lacking and shit
[G]LADY[s]; MUCK = shit
28 BREATHING Her big bust with tan is what keeps you going
*(Her big tan), with ‘bust’ as the anagram indicator
30 NKRUMAH Ex-President Hank’s out to crush spirit
*(Hank); RUM = spirit
Kwame Nkrumah, leader of Ghana and its predecessor state, the Gold Coast, from 1952 to 1966
33 NAIL FILES Spike with flies undone — they make member’s extremities presentable
NAIL = Spike; *(flies), with ‘undone’ as the anagram indicator
35 ERNEST Bevin’s grave is lacking one
E[a]RNEST
36 LEAN-TO Clean todger, holding supported erection
Hidden in ‘Clean todger’
37 KNIGHTLY Valiant bonk’s climax at the end of each day
K = bonk’s climax; NIGHTLY = at the end of each day
39 BEHINDS Arses supporting Socialist leader
BEHIND = supporting; S = Socialist leader
41 LITTLE ENGLANDER Poor Nell enlarged tit, being a fiercely independent nationalist
*(Nell enlarged tit)
Little Englander
43 HYPOCHONDRIAC Crony involved with ad hoc hip replacement (he’s ill in the mind)
*(Crony ad hoc hip)
45 REFUTE Show it’s wrong to mix turf with a couple of stimulants
*(turf EE)
47 OPTIC Love Tony’s head in photo being Eye-related
O = Love; T = Tony’s head; in PIC = photo
50 SEARCHLIGHT Insult about organ attached to small chain, as plane-spotters’ aid?
SLIGHT = Insult; EAR = organ; CH = small chain
51 LEFT-FOOTED Not the sort of person to give you a right kicking?
Self-explanatory, though I wrote LEFT-FOOTER before realising that R didn’t make sense in the perimeter
52 DISINHIBIT Make wanton, much revered woman go astray before Hello! piece
DI = much revered woman (Diana, Princess of Wales); SIN = go astray; HI = Hello; BIT = piece
55 TEA FOR TWO Shattering roof, twat “throttles” end of love song
*(roof twat); around E = end of love. Definition: song
56 PSYCHED UP Shy, cupped bust, being mentally prepared
*(Shy cupped), with ‘bust’ as the anagram indicator
58 PEASANT Lowly type covers TV presenter with garden produce
ANT = TV presenter (of Ant and Dec); PEAS = garden produce
59 DEFILER Balls up taking on abrasive type who’ll dirty you
ED [Balls] reversed; FILER = abrasive type
60 ENACTOR One who sees through Bill? “Luvvie after directions”
EN = directions; ACTOR = luvvie. Definition: one who sees through Bill (as in Act of Parliament)
62 SCREEN Stones, being loose, neuter vet
SCREE = loose stones; N = neuter
64 SPREE Peers spoiling for drunken bout?
*(Peers)

 

This year’s festive Enigmatist quiz included a round based on Christmas cracker (carelessly, I put ‘card’ before)  jokes. Here’s one that didn’t make it into the final cut:

Doctor to patient: “Mr Jones, I’m afraid you really are going to have to stop masturbating.”

Patient: “Why, doctor?”

Doctor: “Because I’m trying to examine you.”

10 Responses to “Cyclops 454: Did you have a luvvie-ly time?”

  1. Pelham Barton says:

    Hi Jetdoc. I think 7dn is ORGAN + DY, so it does use the endings of “good lengthy” as the climaxes. A small blemish on a blog that must have taken a good deal of time to put together.

  2. jetdoc says:

    Thanks, Pelham. Just goes to show that time spent proofreading is never wasted!

  3. Bamberger says:

    I had to cheat on Nabokov and Nkrumah. Well done anyone who has heard of the latter. Also cheated on the quote -tried and failed with the perimeter crossing letters and the supplied letters.

  4. simon says:

    An afternoon? It took you a whole afternoon? Actually, I’m very impressed. It took me the best part of 2 weeks to finish because I, too, got stuck on Nkrumah and one or two others I’d never heard of, like Organdy.

  5. jetdoc says:

    Years of practice on Cyclops, Simon… plus I sort-of remember Nkrumah, which rather depressingly ages me a bit.

  6. grandpuzzler says:

    Thanks, jetdoc. SPIRO AGNEW anagrams to GROW A PENIS. This factorum may have already been utilized in a Cyclops puzzle that I missed. Are his puzzles available on-line? I can’t find the magazine in the Seattle area.

    Cheers…

  7. jetdoc says:

    I think if you just google ‘Private Eye crossword’ you’ll find it, Grandpuzzler

  8. grandpuzzler says:

    Thanks, jetdoc. Apologies for introducing the non-word, factorum. Incredibly, the word I had in mind was factoid. Somehow it didn’t translate to my typing.

  9. sidey says:

    grandpuzzler, quite a lot of Cyclops puzzles available here http://www.private-eye.co.uk/pictures/crossword/download/ Software to do them (except the specials) here http://www.litsoft.com/across/alite/download/

    Kwame Nkrumah died in 1972, I’m feeling my age too.

  10. Colin Foster says:

    I was pleased to solve this one and I managed to work out the perimeter too, much to my surprise !

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