Fifteensquared

Never knowingly undersolved.

Cyclops 471: If the cap fits…

Posted by jetdoc on June 24th, 2012

jetdoc.

A Cyclops of average difficulty this week (seems like I always say that!), with nothing that held me up for long. I will go for 9d as my fave clue, for its complete absurdity.

Across
7 BROWNING Poet ‘doing a Gordon’?
Robert Browning; reference to Gordon Brown
8 PELVIS Penny and rock star moved when having a shag
P = Penny; ELVIS Presley, presumably, though personally I much prefer Elvis Costello. The pelvis is moved when having a shag.
10 FUNGI Staleness round middle of penis? Stick iodine on growth
FUG = staleness; round N = middle of penis; I = iodine
11 SNOWDONIA Quite peaky, this pissed Adonis comes round promptly
*(Adonis); round NOW = promptly. Snowdonia is quite peaky.
12 OPTICAL Eye’s description when drunken sot bows out of post-coital confusion?
Anagram of ‘post-coital’ minus S, O and T. Good clue.
14 NAFF ALL Nothing vulgar about groupie having tumble
FAN = groupie, reversed; FALL = tumble. Euphemism for ‘fuck all’ = nothing
16 NUMBER CRUNCHING Lord Gnome’s vital statistics even more dull before consuming the hard stuff
NUMBER = even more dull; CRUNCHING = consuming the hard stuff. A reference to the excellent Private Eye feature which compares statistics and thus highlights examples of insanity
19 SHAFTED Balls trailing after Ray screwed?
SHAFT = ray; ED Balls, Shadow Chancellor and MP for Morley and Outwood
20 NOTEPAD ’Tone’ forced to pussyfoot being PC?
*(Tone), with ‘forced’ as the anagram indicator; PAD = pussyfoot. A type of personal computer (PC)
22 MANHATTAN City’s major financial, etc. centre — Brown after bloke with cover
MAN = bloke; HAT = cover; TAN = brown
26 ERSATZ Substitute arse formed (pimple turned one out)
*(arse); Z[i]T = pimple, minus I and reversed
27 DUTCH CAP For one who’d have no conception of a European country’s fiscal measure
Double definition: a contraceptive device which, according to the website, “to the best of our knowledge … is no longer being manufactured anywhere”; a fiscal measure applied in the Netherlands.
Down
1 BONNET Hood, good Sarkozy-style, to cover bag
BON = good, in French; NET = bag, in the sense of ‘catch’
2 INDISCREET Tactless girl’s puncturing sad, loveless erection
DI’S = girl’s; in *(ERECTIN), i.e. ‘erection’ minus O = love
4/3 DEAD ENDS Numb butts not welcomed by go-ahead types
DEAD = numb; ENDS = butts
5 SVENGALI Evil controller, Sun, leaving in disgrace
S = sun; *(leaving), with ‘in disgrace’ as the anagram indicator.
Svengali
6 ISRAEL State of our old PM releasing grip of celebrated car crash victim
Former Prime Minister Benjamin DISRAELI, minus DI, Diana, Princess of Wales
7 BUFFOON Brown got by balls — name the joker!
BUFF = Brown; OO = balls; N = name
9 DOWNTURN Horrible turd comes round to admit Cameron’s final decline
*(turd); OWN = admit; N = Cameron’s final. Very inventive!
13 LUCIDITY Clear expression of woman stifling Cyclops on date with sex
LUCY = woman; I – Cyclops; D = date; IT = sex
15 FACE TO FACE Act odd with a coffee? That’s not how the bugger would do it
*(act a coffee). Depending on your definition of ‘bugger’, interpret this as you will.
17 MEANNESS Spiteful thing, Ann Widdecombe finally in the shit
ANN; E = Widdecombe finally; in MESS
18 GIDDY UP Rather unsteady with an erection? Get a move on!
GIDDY = rather unsteady; UP = with an erection
19 SEMTEX Met. in trouble (infiltrating Congress) — explosive stuff
*(Met); in SEX = congress
21 PIRACY Depp’s movie activity, being self-righteous and vulgar
PI = self-righteous; RACY = vulgar. I believe Johnny Depp was in Pirates of the Caribbean.
23/25 ARTY FARTY Tray misused as a windbreaker, Brian Sewell fashion?
*(tray); FARTY = prone to fart, therefore a breaker of wind.
Brian Sewell (do check this one out — it’s worth it… and there’s more Johnny Depp in piracy mode!)
24 NOUS Sod all in tabloid uplifting, which makes good sense
O = sod all (nothing); in SUN, reversed, or tabloid uplifting

 

Here’s this week’s picture, for those that haven’t already seen it:

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

Finally, I take this opportunity to say that, on 7 July, I will be taking part in Race for Life in Finsbury Park, in aid of Cancer Research UK. If you could spare a little sponsorship money, please go to my fund-raising page.

4 Responses to “Cyclops 471: If the cap fits…”

  1. Bamberger says:

    For 10a I had ??n?i and I immediately thought of ennui which fitted staleness in my book. Couldn’t see the wordplay but nothing new there. That meant 7d was b?e?o?n and nothing would fit.
    For 2d I had indiscrete which made 19a s?a?e?d. Why on earth was the answer seaweed?
    Took ages to sort that out-if someone had asked me to spell check indiscreet , I would have told them they had got it wrong.

  2. Trailman says:

    Me too Bamberger. I rationalised SEAWEED by presuming Ray meant the fish and Balls its reproduction and so there was some link to the ‘mermaids’ purses’ which wash up as Seaweed does. The hoops one jumps through to justify an answer …

  3. Will says:

    You do both know that “indiscrete” is a word, but not in this context, don’t you?

  4. Bamberger says:

    Will @3 -yes but I thought that being less than cautious was spelled indiscrete. I’ll remember that.

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