Clever and amusing clue surfaces from the setter. Thanks to Hoskins Definitions are underlined in the clues.
Across
1 What one may do on a sunbed: turn sort of orange? (5)
TANGO : TAN(what one may do, and what one may get, lying on a sunbed) + GO(one’s turn to attempt something, eg. in a multiplayer game).
4 Don’t worry about the likes of rats, Ned (5,4)
NEVER MIND : VERMIN(wild animals such as;the likes of rats which carry disease) contained in(about …, …) NED.
9 Slur like individual drinking fifth of tequila (9)
ASPERSION : AS(like;in the same way, as in “she feels as I do”) + PERSON(an individual) containing(drinking) the 5th letter of(fifth of) “tequila“.
10 Smashing drink with Harry’s granny (5)
SUPER : SUP(to drink) plus(with) ER(abbrev. for “Elizabeth Regina”, the Queen and Prince Harry’s granny).
Defn: Excellent!
11 In and of itself, a swear word repelled Henry (2,4)
AS SUCH : A + reversal of(… repelled) CUSS(or curse, a swear word) + H(symbol for the Henry, unit of electrical inductance in physics).
12 Pale yellow wine that’s proper going to head (8)
PRIMROSE : ROSÉ(a style of wine that is pink-coloured) placed after(… going to head) PRIM(describing someone that’s proper;strait-laced, as in “my aunt’s prim and proper”).
14 Boorish young drunks spoiled goal and result (5,5)
LAGER LOUTS : Anagram of(spoiled) [ GOAL plus(and) RESULT ].
16 Corpse without a head could be little Barney (4)
TIFF : “stiff”(slang for a corpse) minus its 1st letter(without a head) .
Defn: A little;petty quarrel, a Barney in slang.
19 Benefit of party member avoiding Green leader (4)
DOLE : DO(a party;a social function) + “leg”(a member;a part of an animal’s body, such as a leg or an arm) minus the 1st letter of(avoiding … leader) “Green“.
Defn: … paid by the state to the unemployed.
20 Brilliant hidden … (3,2,5)
OUT OF SIGHT : Double defn: 1st: …;extremely good.
22 … clue? Heard composer’s a visionary (8)
IDEALIST : IDEA(a clue;a vague notion, as in “I have no idea as to what you meant”) + homophone of(Heard) “Lizst”(Franz, Hungarian composer).
23 Complete course of Nordic language (spoken) (6)
FINISH : Homophone of(… (spoken)) “Finnish”(Nordic language).
26 Part of an insect found in casino tumbler (5)
NOTUM : Hidden in(found in) “casino tumbler“.
Defn: …’s body.
27 Withdrawal is over? Uplifting feeling to be drug-free! (9)
ISOLATION : IS + O(abbrev. for “over” in cricket scores) + “elation”(an uplifting feeling;great happiness) minus(to be …-free) “e”(abbrev. for the drug, ecstasy).
28 One strung out in a court before judges? (6,3)
TENNIS NET : Cryptic defn: Reference to what’s in front;before the umpires;judges in a tennis match.
29 Skirt of the First Lady that Bill puts on (5)
EVADE : EVE(the first lady in the human race from the Biblical Garden of Eden) containing(that … puts on) AD(short for “advertisement”, of which a bill;handbill;poster is an example).
Down
1 Worked painfully hard to ruin rival date (9)
TRAVAILED : Anagram of(to ruin) RIVAL DATE.
2 Scruffs catch forty winks on beds regularly (5)
NAPES : NAP(to catch forty winks) placed above(on, in a down clue) the 2nd and 4thletters of(… regularly) “beds“.
3 Odd trace of drugs coroner officially documented (2,6)
ON RECORD : Anagram of(Odd) [ the 1st letter of(trace of)” drugs” + CORONER ].
4 New trouble for one that held Jesus’ hand? (4)
NAIL : N(abbrev. for “new”) + AIL(to trouble, as in “what ails you?”).
Defn: … to the crucifix.
5 Archdeacon on ecstasy helping with worship (10)
VENERATION : VEN(abbrev. for “Venerable”, title for an Anglican archdeacon) + E(abbrev. for “ecstasy”, the drug) + RATION(a helping;a fixed amount of something allowed to each person).
6 Drug taker coming up with yours truly? Go on! (6)
RESUME : Reversal of(… coming up, in a down clue) USER(a drug taker) plus(with) ME(yours truly).
7 One rambling about politician being on the up and up (9)
IMPROVING : [ I(Roman number for “one”) + ROVING(rambling;wandering) ] containing(about) MP(abbrev. for “Member of Partliament”, a politician).
8 Lament awful, but entertaining head of government (5)
DIRGE : DIRE(awful;of very poor quality) containing(but entertaining) the 1st letter of(head of) “government“.
Defn: … for the dead.
13 Nothing at all to ask me? Undoubtedly! (2,8)
NO QUESTION : “NO QUESTION”, said in agreement to the leading question “Nothing at all to ask me?“.
15 On TV, gales battered a port in Texas (9)
GALVESTON : Anagram of(… battered) ON TV, GALES.
17 Likelihood of the morbidly obese avoiding health issues? (3,6)
FAT CHANCE : FAT(obese) CHANCE(likelihood of something happening).
And of course it’s also the likelihood of an unhealthily;morbidly fat person avoiding health issues. A WIWD (wordplay intertwined with definition) clue.
18 Reckon Hoskins is involved in broken tea set (8)
ESTIMATE : I’M(“I am”;Hoskins is, with setter using the self-referencing pronoun) contained in(involved in) anagram of(broken) TEA SET.
21 New Milan university could produce these (6)
ALUMNI : Anagram of(New) [MILAN + U(abbrev. for “university”) ].
Defn: …, former students.
22 Is it not common to have sex after the pub? (5)
INNIT : IT(slang for “sexual intercourse”, as “they were at it like rabbits”) placed below(after, in a down clue) INN(a pub).
If not it, then perhaps a curry?
Defn: Commonly used but non-standard contraction of “Is it not?”
24 One little business on a Mediterranean island (5)
IBIZA : I(Roman numeral for “one”) + BIZ(short for;little “business”) placed above(on, in a down clue) A.
25 Money? Tons is kept beneath throne room (4)
LOOT : T(abbrev. for “tons”, the units of weight) placed below(on, in a down clue) LOO(the toilet which is also euphemistically called the throne room).
Defn: Slang for “money”.
Great surfaces all round! INNIT and SUPER both raised a chuckle.
The only meaning I had to check was TANGO – presumably it’s referring to the soft drink sold in the UK, or was it intended to refer to a shade of orange? Either way, or both, it works.
Not religious, but blanched slightly at 4D. Let’s see a similar airy reference in Hoskins’ next to another religion.
22A The spelling is Liszt.
Great fun. The inclusion of Galveston is grimly topical, particularly with this wordplay, although it also had me looking for a Glen Campbell tribute.
I also suspected a pangram at one point.
I must take exception with the ageism displayed in 14; I’m 60 and I have my moments with 8 pints of Stella on board.
Thanks to S&B
barchen @3-I cant see you drinking Stella esp where you live.8 pints, yes!
A Hoskins puzzle always welcome especially on a Sunday. My only quibble is “business” in 24 which kinds gives the game away. Being no setter myself, I’ll leave that to the experts.
Thanks, scchua.
The familiar Hoskins concoction of sex, drugs and alcohol – hilarious as ever. My favourites today were 4ac and the glorious picture conjured up by 5dn.
Many thanks, as always, Harry, for the fun.
“Very wrong and not at all funny.”
Thanks to Harry and scchua.
I’m with Eileen@5 re 4ac, a nice tee-hee moment. Par for the course subject matter, and that’s fine by me.
Thanks to S&B
Time to give the source of my above quote. Might also add that I agree only with the first part in relation to this crossword!
So there I was, really enjoying this one until I came to 4d. Sorry, Harry, I’m not a religious person but nevertheless think that you went much too far with that one – it ruined the solve for me.
Brilliant Harry, esp. 4d.
just getting back to crosswords after a 3-week break, and this was a pleasure, not difficult and requiring no searching. I really liked the ellipses and GALVESTON.
Many thanks also to scchua, i missed the parsing of ON RECORD.
I have to say that,as a ‘religious person’, I was not outraged by 4dn: as I implied above, I was too absorbed by the irreverent picture of our own Archdeacon.
Lovely puzzle. Harry’s clues always seem so effortless.
Yes, Jim, that’s exactly what it is.
And that’s why he is such a natural.
And so good.
Time for The Guardian to wake up?
Many thanks to scchua for the thorough and pic-filled blog, and to all who solved and especially those who took the time to comment.
Glad the puzzle brought some laughs and smiles for the most part and apologies to those who thought 4d a step too far. I must admit I didn’t bat an eyelid when writing it and I didn’t think I was taking the mick out of Jesus or that it was in bad taste (in fact, this puzzle was labelled ‘korma’ which is the lowest of my spice ratings). On reflection, I guess it does conjure a gruesome image, but then again that image and far more explicit imagery is a mainstay in the iconography of Christianity so I suppose not too bad in the schemata of things.
If truth be told, I was much more worried about 16a being read in the sense of a kid rather than a gangster – as in ‘little Barney’ on account of the guy being a 6 foot five and 300 pound Mafioso – but looks like that one passed the yuck test.
In light of the Texas floods, the Galveston clue was not my finest hour – obviously this puzzle was written months ago so just an unhappy coincidence – but had I been more on the ball I would’ve sent the boss an alt. clue or two as I did when I had a boxing clue that could have been read as in poor taste at the time of Muhammad Ali’s death.
Talking of Muhammads, gwep @2, I’ll have a think about your suggestion, though I should add that I’ve been thinking some things over for decades so I wouldn’t hold yer breath … on the upside, that means I won’t have to have mine held either …
Either or anyways on the taste front, I certainly don’t want to upset folks, but at the same time I have to work to my internal censor and I feel I have a goodish sense of what and where there line is nowadays and my transgressions are normally only a toe and, really, I am still quite surprised 4d raised any eyebrows at all. Still, different strokes for different folks and I certainly wouldn’t say just coz I didn’t think 4d too much it wasn’t too much for some: so apologies again to anyone it spoiled the puzzle for.
In summary, I can’t say I won’t ever offend again – after all, on my passport under occupation it does read hire-wire act – but please know that if I do offend it is not usually purposefully and I am sorry to anyone it does offend and I offer free hugs and cuddles* by way of consolation (though the downside is it is me you’ll have to be hugging or cuddling).
Anyhoo, having said me piece, I think we can now get on to the much more important and continuing escapades in the life of Mrs Jalopy – the long-serving and extremely inventive keeper of The Fabled Fifteen Squared drinks trolley.
Long time readers will be aware that our Mrs Jalopy had recently suffered a punctured urn – more painful to those wanting a drink than herself, you’ll be glad to know – after Serpent uncharacteristically overfilled the urn with Babycham in preparation for the Indy setter’s summer fair.
Well, after a jaunt around B&Q our heroine managed to pick up some super-strength, quick-drying super glue and, with the help of the right-honourable Quaiteaux, managed to plug the leak quite successfully. Of course, this being the world of Jalopy and the drinks trolley things didn’t go quite as smoothly as they would over at the word-perfect Grauniad as I shall now, with some sadness and much trepidation, relate to you.
It was Friday last when, after a long and tiring day of thinking up silly things to say in crossword form, I heard the familiar rumble of the drinks trolley heading up the corridor of the Indy offices. Nothing particularly sad there to report other than the Indy office being down the corridor rather than up, but this was a common Jalopyian mistake and, rather like a Hoskins within twenty miles of a drink scented on the merest of breezes, she always got to her goal in the end.
‘Super’, I said to myself, for myself is the only person who talks to me at the Indy offices after the incident with the group photograph and the swimming pool and the instructions for everyone to get a little further back so as to get them all in.
‘Super-dooper’ I replied to myself, and tried to ignore the grimace of Raich and his once loose-fitting suit, now shrunk to within an inch of its life due to vicious combination of water and chlorine. ‘Super-dooper’ I repeated, ‘Just what a man such as I needs: a little drinky-doo after such a seriously hard day’s silliness.’ And so I meandered my way over to the office door so as to be first in line for a moderate amount of Babycham when Mrs Jalopy arrived.
I do declare I have to report to you that there was something a little different about the rumble of the drinks trolley as it approached the door this time – yes, as it neared there was definitely something different indeed …
Where before there had simply been the rumble and the tinkle of glasses combined with the snort-sneeze-whizz of Mrs Jalopy’s fifty-a-day lungs and shooosh-scut-shoosh-scut of her bad foot trailing the trolley; this time there was something new, something new and, dare I say it, something very disturbing indeed.
The new sound was North-American in origin and disgruntled in tone; what’s more it played an unmerry tune mixed with the rumble and tinkle of the trolley and the snort-sneeze-whoosh and shoosh-scut-shoosh-scut of the now perilously close Mrs Jalopy.
It was a sound I shall never forget and quite discombobulating to the eyes and strange to the nose it was – but what was it? I was soon to find out and once found out there was no more chance of unfinding it than there was of unfinding a hidden word in a Mike Laws swansong puzzle!
On the offbeat of the traditional Jalopyian sounds was a ‘grrr-fnnnr-grrr-boink!’ that repeated and repeated until my poor and innocent Hoskinsian lugholes thought they could take it no more! Yes, as it played its strange tune and got louder and louder as it approached the office door I fairly shook and shivered in my size twelve boots (well, I say my boots – really they are one of Dutch’s and one Vigo’s and yet another reason that no-one talks to me in the Indy office).
At last the door began to inch its way open, and as it did the hellish noise grew to such a level of intensity that at least once Indy setter – who shall remain nameless as Knut asked me not to mention his name as he told his wife a different story about the dry cleaning bill – managed to visit the bathroom a full five minutes before entering said bathroom.
And then there it was, the tip of the trolley in the room and something more. The strangest sight now came to us in increments with a rumble and a tinkle and a snort-sneeze-whoosh; yes, that strangest of and most terrifying of sights greeted us with a shoosh-scut-shoosh-scut and a grrr-fnnnr-grrr-boink!
‘Drinks up’ said Mrs Jalopy when fully in the room. She sounded as nonchalant as a Tory politician announcing cuts that won’t affect her or her friends or even the friends of her friends fondue-twirling group and it had the effect of dumbfounding the room in contrast with the horrific sight before us.
We all of us, I think not a single woman jack of us, said a word as we watched the trolley enter the room with its disgruntled Quaiteaux super-glued to the left wheel of said trolley, grrring and fnarring on the up and down cycle of the trolley wheel in her unmistakable North-American accent and then boinking her head as the wheel moved on inexorably on towards us.
‘Twenty three Babychams for me,’ I said brightly before colouring slightly at forgetting my manners. ‘Anything for you, Quaiteaux?’ I added quickly and felt good inside that I had saved my manners after all.
I must admit I was slightly put out by Quaiteaux’s rudeness as she didn’t even answer me! All I got for my troubles of politeness was a slightly concussed look and grrr-fnnrrr-boink from her that, if I be honest, just sounded like if it were forced and she didn’t really want to say it at all.
Anyhoo, after drinking twenty-eight of my twenty-three Babychams I soon forgot about all that and came up with what I thought was a pretty good clue for my man gwep wot might or might not make it into me next puzzle – of course, I can’t recall it too well right now and that’s prolly for the best so I think I’ll retire now back to the trolley meself and invite you all with me. Plenty of drinks to go round and, if there be a doctor and an anti-super-glue expert in attendance then I am sure, despite her rudeness, that our Quaiteaux might appreciate some assistance, too.
PHEW! I think I once again got away with a succinct post and, so succinct this has been I am now considering entering myself in the National Brevity Contest (not open to all-comers, just those who get in early).
As ever, thanks to everyone and I look forward to seeing you all next time around which should be a week on Tuesday with an easyish thematic (and korma) puzzle – though of course it’s more likely it’ll be on the morrow where there’s a Knut puzzle to kick off out Indy week (not done it yet as am out of sync having taking a week or so’s solving holiday, but as you’ll all know Knut is a synonym of funny, entertaining and inventive so you can betcha black forest gateaux it’ll be damn tasty indeed!).
Cheers and chin chin to all 🙂
*for those interested, the difference between a hug and a cuddle (according to my copy of BedChambers 12th Ed.) is the former is on the perpendicular, the latter on the horizontal.
Thanks Harry for the fun. We wondered how we could know your Granny’s name for us to be able to complete 10ac until the penny dropped. It raised a smile in this household.
We have now almost caught up on the puzzles we missed while we were away – sorry Hoskins – we haven’t got the time to read through all of your comments above but thanks for the info on setting the puzzle!
Thanks scchua.
Cheers B&J – and never fear, for the time poor (or just plain sensible) I can Reader’s Digest comment 14 for you in the following manner:
– Thanks for solving and blogging
– Apologies for 4d
– 4d didn’t seem so bad
– apologies anyways
– might do 4d again at some point
– Quaiteaux gets superglued to the fable Fifteen Squared drinks trolley when trying to plug a puncture
– I’ll be back in the Indy on Tuesday week with ab easyish themer
– good Knut puzzle tomorrow (which is actually today)
🙂
Hi. Long-time reader, first-time poster, very much still learning.
Just wanted to say thanks to Hoskins for a fun and entertaining puzzle. And episode of the Jalopy saga.
I’m solving about three weeks behind current, and saved this one for today, which is my birthday. Definitely gave many laughs and giggles.