Private Eye ( Cyclops/668 ) Kinky Fatwa

A mixed bag of difficulty here.

I started off fast finding 1a a virtual write-in and was slapping clues in at a rate of knots down the left hand side and bottom.  I particularly liked the way the split answer 15/24 opened up the bottom half of the puzzle.
But I slowed down at about the halfway mark when I came up against a few clues that I found very tough.
15 Down foxed me every time I looked at it till I had all crossing letters, but they all came swiftly enough from the early solving.
It was the Top Right corner that was very empty – the last six unsolved were all there: 4 11 13 / 5 6 7 – these took at least as long as the rest of the puzzle to get.  While a few of them fall into the “should have got earlier” category, I think the others were quite hard for me.  For instance, I do not associate the pin removed from a grenade with anything to do with safety, and when trying to think of 5 letter ports I don’t tend to think of ancient ports.
The worst and last was 4A Scissors – gym exercises are something I am not familiar with.

Across
1 STARVE Celeb wants sources of Viagra, extra fast! (6)
STAR (celeb) V[iagra] E[xtra].  First read, first solved.
4 SCISSORS Gym exercises piss Ross off – “clubs should replace power” (8)
(PISS ROSS – P[ower] + C[lubs])* AInd: off. Last one in.  Needed all crossing letters. Gym exercises are something I am not familiar with.
10 NOT A TRACE No hint of actor screwing with Nate (3,1,5)
(ACTOR NATE)* AInd: screwing with
11 FATWA Gross Washington death sentence? (5)
FAT (Gross) WA (Washington, state).  One of those in the “should have got earlier” category
12/3 CARD VOTE In which one raised hand might represent thousands of “very into art deco” nuts (4,4)
V[ery] inside (ART DECO)* AInd: nuts
13 SLAVE TRADE Labour deal which should quite rightly be abolished (5,5)
SLAVE (Labour) TRADE (deal).  One of those in the “should have got earlier” category
15/24 HAPPY NEW YEAR PAYE hype: warn about rather optimistic message at this time? (5,3,4)
(PAYE HYPE WARN)* AInd: about
16 APPEAL Request clumsy ape to get into lap dancing (6)
(APE)* AInd: clumsy, inside (LAP)* AInd: dancing
19 ABDUCT Take pathetically bad union leader before court (6)
(BAD)* AInd: pathetically bad, U[nion] CT (court)
20 UNENDING Large body and rear … gin-sozzled … forever going on (8)
UN (Large body) END (rear) (GIN)* AInd: sozzled.  For some time I wondered where the “EN” came from having assumed “and rear” gave D from [an]D
22 TAKEN SHORT Desperately needing relief, snatched a drink of spirits (5,5)
TAKEN (snatched) SHORT (a drink of spirits)
27 CONGA Line dance scam – good one (5)
CON (scam) G[ood] A (one)
28 LEICESTER Labour leader has shameful secret, i.e. being a favourite of the Queen (9)
L[abour] (SECRET I.E.)* AInd: shameful.  ER I is the Queen in question here
29 EGYPTIAN Concerning the country‘s inept gay movement (8)
(INEPT GAY)* AInd: movement
30 UNWELL Bad example of international co-operation before Spring (6)
UN (example of international co-operation) WELL (spring)
Down
1 SONIC Making very fast progress is no possibility” (Corbyn’s opening) (5)
(IS NO)* AInd: possibility, C[orbyn]
2 ARTHROPOD A spider possibly could metamorphose into parrot? D’oh! (9)
(PARROT D’OH)* AInd: metamorphose into
5 CLEAVE Stick to Dominic ultimately, not Remain! (6)
[domini]C LEAVE (not Remain).  One of those in the “should have got earlier” category
6 SAFETY PINS Stretch top panties, extremely fancy, frantically removed by soldiers hoping for a bang (6,4)
S[tretch], then (PANTIES F[anc]Y) AInd: frantically.
7 OSTIA Port – love it as liquid! (5)
O (love) (IT AS )* AInd: liquid. Might have got this sooner if the clue said “ancient port
8 SHAKE A LEG A leek casually inserted during bonk – “get a move on!” (5,1,3)
(A LEEK)* AInd: casually, inside SHAG (bonk)
9 HAULIER Head from Hugh Laurie’s dodgy truck driver? (7)
H[ugh] (LAURIE)* AInd: dodgy
14 EYE CONTACT Looking directly at organ, study with discretion (3,7)
EYE (organ) CON (study) TACT (discretion)
15 HEARTACHE Bottle each piss-poor sorrow (9)
HEART (bottle) (EACH)* AInd: pisspoor
17 EPICENTRE Where the earth started moving on a big scale” – some dish, getting end away (9)
EPIC (on a big scale) ENTRE[è]
18 ANDROID Moreover, Dior creation depressed Marvin, for one (7)
AND (moreover) (DIOR)* AInd: creation. Ref. Marvin the Paranoid Android in HHGTTG
21 THELMA Brothel madam protecting a female’s name (6)
Hidden in broTHEL MAdam
23 KINKY Writing stuff with protection of state – that’s perverted (5)
INK (writing stuff) inside KY (Kentucky, state)
25/26 RURAL DEAN Corrupt ruler and a member of the clergy (5,4)
(RULER AND A)* AInd: corrupt

I’m sick and tired of people going on and on, and complaining about the price of things. £2 for a cup of tea, £3.00 for a coffee, £3.50 for a piece of cake. If there’s much more of it I’m going to stop inviting people round to my place.

10 comments on “Private Eye ( Cyclops/668 ) Kinky Fatwa”

  1. Thanks beermagnet. Re 7d I hadn’t heard of OSTIA and it was only because Chambers Crossword Dictionary came to my rescue that I slotted it in. 2d was one that left me feeling quite smug as ARTHROPOD was unknown to me, but it sounded like it existed. A quick google confirmed it (might have been buried deep in the sub conscious).
    By the way, I like your joke, but it brought back a recent painful memory where I was charged £5.45 for a bottle of Erdinger (non alcohol beer) in a pub. Based on your moniker, you may not have any sympathy for me.

  2. You may be surprised Franko, but since last summer I have downed a fair bit of low alcohol beer.
    A holiday in Suffolk where much driving was necessary brought Adnams Ghost Ship 0.5% to my attention and I developed a taste for it. Very much like the full-fat version, I now have a virtual standing order for it with Dry Drinker.  So overall I now generally drink as much beer beer but less alcohol.
    I always stick to proper beer in pubs – except occasionally a ginger beer to start – the low alcohol offerings are generally either rubbish or overpriced, or both.
    And thanks for the scissors exercise demo – I’ve only seen the inside of a gym through the windows and most people seem to be on bikes going nowhere.

  3. I got OSTIA from the wordplay before confirming it was a port.

    THELMA was LOI, I think. Spent a long time failing to think of another term for a brothel madam before turning to wordsearch. Doh!

    Most amused to learn that EGYPTIAN is an anagram of inept gay.

    SAFETY PINS is obviously what they are, but I’ve never heard the full name either. Great surface.

    CONGA was the subject of the Sunday Times cluing comp one week last year and the winning entry (from one Peter Bennett of St Albans, Hertfordshire) was more Cyclopsian than Cyclops’ own clue:

    Follow the party line?

    According to a commenter on Site Feedback here at 15², it seems that what I think must have been the website of Eddie James (Cyclops), “EJ’s Crossword Showcase” is no longer available.

  4. Tony @4 — it is years since that website has been live, but the archived version remains preserved in cyber-aspic and is still reachable via this abbreviations link (which I first found on Wikipedia).

  5. John, thanks very much for that. In fact I realise I was on that archive not long ago from a link that I got probably got here, too, I think (maybe even from you?). I’d forgotten it was in archive form. I should keep a bookmark for it. There’s a lot of good stuff there.

  6. Thanks for the explanations beermagnet. Seems like I solved this in much the same approximate order as you with the same final sticking points at the top right. I had never heard of RURAL DEAN but was clear enough from crossers and wordplay, while CARD VOTE was something I had to google after the entry to see if it was “a thing”. I looked up OSTIA too, to make sure, but once the crossers were there it was a clear favourite over the alternative. Any crossword referencing the mighty HHGTTG gets my vote, so thanks Cyclops.

  7. 14D dropped me right in it. I took it as ‘eye closely’ and so my bottom left hand corner suffered. I eventually gave up on my solution and searched elsewhere and hey presto I eventually solved. But ‘unwell’ was the last in. Unusual to have two UNs in the same puzzle….albeit form differing parsings.

  8. Thanks beermagnet@3, I’m also fond of Ghost Ship full-fat so must give the low alcohol version a whirl. This could be the start of an additional career for you on top of Crossword Guru, i.e. Social media Influencer. I’ve seen them referred to on daily mail online (dear lord, please forgive me).
    Gazzh @8 I remember having a very similar experience with those three clues.

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