Cyclops 814 – Apoplectic Diplomat

Do not adjust your sets! Due to an administrative and logistical c0ck-up I forgot to blog Eye 813, for which my abject apologies, but beermagnet kindly filled in for me, to whom my eternal thanks, and I am now on even-numbered puzzles – at least until the Christmas Special messes around with our schedule…

Anyway, now that the hangover from my golfing trip to Spain has subsided, I can focus on this puzzle.

With serendipitous timing, it seems as I write this that the APOPLEPTIC DIPLOMAT, aka Donald Trump or the ‘mango Mussolini‘, as I saw him described elsewhere, may have secured some sort of peace in the Israel/Gaza conflict. Maybe the ‘me’ in Trump’s ‘it’s all about me, me, me‘ turns out to be the Middle East (ME) after all?…

But there I go, bringing Trump into it when he doesn’t even get a mention in the clues or solutions, although his UK mini-me/alter-ego Nigel Farage pops up, maybe appropriately, in 17A THE FAR RIGHT.

I enjoyed the HOOKAH pipe at 8A as a ‘puffy thing’, and the SOBER judges at 11D contrasted with the p1ss-up in a BREWERY at 15A!

 

 

Otherwise the usual mix of irreverence, smuttery and risqué clues – defecation, retching, hard-ons, injured testes and a todger, plus an ‘exhibitionist broadcaster taking heroin’ – that one would expect from a Cyclops puzzle.

To whom my thanks for the entertainment, and ‘bad luck’ on the Nobel Prize, Don – maybe next year?…

 

Across
Clue No Solution Clue (definition underlined)

Logic/parsing

7A DIPLOMAT Negotiator told a PM to “shift and get one in!” (8)

D_PLOMAT (anag, i.e. to shift, of TOLD A PM) around (getting in) I (one)

8A HOOKAH Pirate captain with a hard on – puffy thing (6)

HOOK (Captain Hook, fictional pirate) + A + H (hard, pencil lead calibration)

[one puffs on a hookah pipe]

9A CUPID Archer going by a different name in Piccadilly (5)

the Roman love god CUPID, famous for his bow-and-arrow, goes by his Greek equivalent’s name Eros for his statue in Piccadilly Circus!

10A BESET Plague caused by drug in the cream (5)

BES_T (the cream) around E (Ecstasy tablet, drug)

12A NET (ZERO) & 24dn. Nick Love would be scrapped by Reform UK (3,4)

NET (nick, arrest) + ZERO (love, score in e.g. tennis)

13A DIETING Experiencing a fast, contrived edit in Guardian leader (7)

DIETIN (anag, i.e. contrived, of EDIT IN) + G (leading letter of Guardian)

15A BREWERY Incapable? Don’t get involved in a piss-up here, then (7)

if you can’t organise a piss-up in a BREWERY, you are incapable!

[although if you did organise such an event, you might be left incapable at the end of it?]

17A THE FAR RIGHT Farage claims it’s not Reform’s position to get pissed about her RAF movement (3,3,5)

T_IGHT (drunk, pissed) around HE_FAR_R (anag, i.e. movement, of HER RAF)

21A RECOUNT To do with matter demanded by narrowly-losing candidate? (7)

RE (with reference to, to do with) + COUNT (matter, have import)

22A STRETCH Warm-up exercise‘s second time – vomit (7)

S (second) + t (time) + RETCH (vomit)

23A FEZ Iron character, ultimately it goes to one’s head (3)

FE (iron, chemical symbol) + Z (ultimate character of the alphabet)

25A LORDS Legislative body that’s no stranger to spin (5)

punning double defn. – the House of LORDS is a legislative body; and LORDS cricket ground is no stranger to spin bowling!

26A WIDOW Whose partner departed one day in shock (5)

W_OW (to shock, impress) around I (one) + D (day)

27A SURETY Guarantee to stick old rock star in the pen (6)

S_TY (pig pen) around URE (Midge Ure, ageing rock star!)

28A DEFECTOR Force Ted out (backslider) (8)

anag, i.e. out, of FORCE TED

Down
Clue No Solution Clue (definition underlined)

Logic/parsing

1D APOPLECTIC Infuriated police captain casually dumping Ian (10)

subtractive anagram, i.e. casually and dumping IAN, of POLICE CAPT(AIN)

2D VOID Very old Cyclops had to defecate (4)

V (very) + O (old) + ID (I’d, contraction of I HAD, from Cyclops’ point of view)

3D GASBAG US state’s appropriate bigmouth (6)

GAS (GA, Georgia, US state, plus contracted ‘s) + BAG (steal, appropriate)

4D BOOTLEGGER Dismiss going on stage, screwing Reg – that’s criminal (10)

BOOT (dismiss, boot out) + LEG (stage) + GER (anag, or reversal, i.e. screwing, of REG)

5D SKIN Peel‘s people (4)

S (another contracted ‘s!) + KIN (people)

6D SHUT-EYE What dozy type wants: to close magazine (4-3)

SHUT (close) + EYE (the magazine you are reading!)

7D DECADE Luxury yacht assistant’s reported period? (6)

homophone, i.e. reported – an assistant, or AIDE, on a yacht, might be on DECK, so might be a DECK AIDE, which sounds like DECADE, or period of time.

[the ‘luxury’ might be superfluous, although maybe you are more likely to find an aide on a luxury yacht, working for someone rich enough to hire an aide?!…)]

11D SOBER Like judges‘ robes, pants? (5)

anag, i.e. pants, of ROBES

14D INEQUALITY Screwing quietly, in a state of imbalance (10)

anag, i.e. screwing, of QUIETLY IN A

16D ESTATE DUTY Article stuck in injured testes (endlessly on the job), incurring one-time tax (6,4)

EST_TE (anag, i.e. injured, of TESTE(S), endlessly) around A (indefinite article) + DUTY (one’s job)

[one-time, as estate duty, or death duty is now referred to as inheritance tax]

18D ALTAR Broadcast reform over which blood was spilt? (5)

homophone, i.e. broadcast – ALTER (reform) can sound like ALTAR (somewhere blood was once spilt!)

19D PROFUSE Liberal in favour of something that might be blown (7)

PRO (in favour of) + FUSE (something that might blow)

20D SHOWER Exhibitionist broadcaster consuming heroin (6)

S_OWER (broadcaster, of seeds) around (consuming) H (heroin)

22D SYSTEM Todger just begun to be inserted in excited, messy way (6)

SYS_EM (anag, i.e. excited, of MESSY) around (inserting) T (beginning of Todger)

24D ZERO See 12ac. (4)

see 12A

26D WREN Republican in latest upset, a chirpy individual (4)

W_EN (new, latest, upset) around R (Republican)

13 comments on “Cyclops 814 – Apoplectic Diplomat”

  1. Etu

    Great stuff as usual mc, thanks.

    I found this a bit harder than usual, perhaps because I don’t follow general news as closely as I once did.

    This being PE I expect that Farbage will be cropping up for some time yet though…

    Cheers all.

  2. Wellbeck

    A very entertaining and satisfying solve. Lots of ticks, my faves being HOOKAH, LORDS and SHUT-EYE.
    Thanks Cyclops and mc_r

  3. Gordon F

    Yes I agree-good fun-my favourite SKIN

  4. Franko

    Thanks mc_rapper67 for resolving 21a for me. I slotted in RECOUNT but missed COUNT could be MATTER.
    The ‘S in 5d still bothers me for some reason. Great puzzle thanks Cyclops.

  5. ClickRick

    1d APOPLECTIC, not APOPLEPTIC 🙂

  6. Babbler

    Interesting that Gordon F @ 3 chooses SKIN as a favourite. I guessed it but couldn’t parse it.
    I thought this was the most difficult puzzle for a long time.
    I see the prize is now £150. Has it just gone up or have I only just noticed? I’m sure it was only £100 until recently.

  7. Mystogre

    I agree with the comments about the difficulty as, even living on the other side of the world, I usually finish these in one sitting apart from having to check on the odd UK politician. I guess you could argue any politician is odd and not just your variety.
    Anyway this one took me a couple of days to sort out completely.
    As always I enjoyed it so thanks to both.

  8. Competitive Aide

    56 minutes for me.

    Got 17A without knowing the parse, which made crossing to the bottom half easier.

    By the way, the above grid has an error in it – it’s APOPLECTIC not APOPLEPTIC

  9. Barry

    I had SATIN for judge’s robes, which I guess could be made of satin, and also presumably their pants, like everyone else’s, are SAT IN. That threw off everything for me.

  10. mc_rapper67

    Thanks for the comments so far – much appreciated as usual…

    I am beside myself with rage for mis-spelling APPLE OPTIC, especially as I have just realised I had it wrong on my submission entry, so no £150 for me this fortnight (;+<). I don't have the bandwidth to change the grid, so my shame will remain here for all eternity…

    Babbler at #6 – it changed to £150 earlier this year, I believe.

  11. Pete Morris

    Grauniad Prize and Cyclops are easily my fave crosswords. This one seemed to take ages but every time I came back a few more came to light. I think fez is my favourite.

  12. Pete Morris

    And brewery of course.

  13. mc_rapper67

    Thanks, Pete Morris at #11/12 – welcome to the party…better late than never!…

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