Even for a Cyclops, this one abounded in anatomical references. A fairly quick solve for me — nothing in the clues really held me up.
| Across | |||
|---|---|---|---|
| 8 | PSALTERY | Players pissed round toilet’s entrance — it took some pluck in the old days *(Players); around T= ‘toilet’s entrance’. A stringed instrument |
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| 9 | ORDEAL | Tory no. 2 teamed with pisspoor, energy-lacking leader — nightmare! O = Tory no. 2; *(lader), where ‘energy-lacking’ means you need to take an E out |
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| 11 | WATER | John leaves the battle site — wet! Waterloo minus loo (‘john’ is a word for ‘lavatory’) |
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| 12 | DRESSED UP | Put a spin on Ed’s super balls-up, following Miliband’s last one D = Miliband’s last one, *(Eds super) |
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| 13 | PARASOL | Pervy as a prole on getting end away producing UV protection device *(as a prol), where ‘getting end away’ means remove the last letter before anagramming |
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| 15 | BLADDER | Blair broadcast dropped by summer — which peer takes the piss out of BL[air], with air (=broadcast) dropped; ADDER = summer. Peer, in this case, is someone who pees, but does not necessarily have to be a member of the House of Lords. |
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| 17 | CRACKING THE WHIP | Very speedy article by Nick leads to arse-kicking CRACKING = Very speedy; the = article; by whip = nick, in the sense of ‘steal’ |
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| 19 | VIETNAM | Country’s massive performer of hot blow job consumed by energy ETNA = massive performer of hot blow job; in VIM = energy |
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| 20 | MATADOR | Disposer of bull, thanks to party getting into arm twisting TA = thanks; DO = party; *(arm), with ‘twisting’ as the anagram indicator |
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| 23 | LEMON DROP | Sweet old men, screwed by pro, having a turn *(old men pro), with both ‘screwed’ and ‘having a turn’ as anagram indicators |
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| 26 | FRANC | The old Frenchman’s ready to kick butt off dictator Definition: The old Frenchman’s ready, where ‘ready’ is money; the Spanish dictator, Francisco Franco, minus his last letter |
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| 27 | SPARSE | Being skimpy, what boxers might do — slacken elastic tops SPAR = what boxers might do; SE = tops (first letters) of ‘slacken elastic’. Very restrained of Cyclops not to clue ‘arse’ here. |
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| 28 | ET CETERA | Two Tory leaders EEC trashed are ruined, and similar things *(TT EEC are) |
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| Down | |||
| 1 | SPEW UP | Something for a religious arse steeped in drink to heave PEW = a seat in church; in SUP = drink |
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| 2 | MASTURBATE | Satisfy yourself young Mister Harry is to be heard Sounds like ‘Master’ = young Mister; sounds like ‘bait’ = harry. “Laydees and gentlemen, please welcome Mr and Mrs Bates and their son…” |
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| 3 | UTERUS | Labour starts from here — true bastard American *(true); US = American. Labour, as in childbirth, starts right there. |
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| 4/25 | BRAD PITT | Miliband, ultimately hollow, is packaged by whippersnapper as a big star D = Miliband, ultimately; PIT = hollow; in BRAT = whippersnapper |
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| 5 | PROSTATE | On your back, scrubbing tip of todger? That should help with semen production PROST[r]ATE, the missing R indicated by ‘scrubbing tip of todger’. The prostate gland (lotsa pics!) |
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| 6/24 | DEAD MEAT | You’ll be in grave trouble being so straight — mate indiscriminately! DEAD = as in ‘dead straight’; *(mate). If you’re dead meat, you’re in trouble. |
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| 7 | CLAPTRAP | Balls gets not much applause, having coarse mouth CLAP = not much applause; TRAP = coarse [word for] mouth. Definition: balls |
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| 10 | VERBATIM | About Rev. Blair’s capital cash dispenser: one inside’s reported with no change VER = About Rev; B = Blair’s capital; ATM = cash dispenser; with I = one, inside. Definition: reported with no change |
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| 14 | LANDMARK | Monument? Come down to earth, Thatcher! LAND = Come down to earth; MARK Thatcher. Just too ghastly to mention any further! |
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| 16 | DEHYDRATED | Howe, leader-wise in awful dread yet, departs (the “wet” having been got rid of) *(H dread yet). For those who remember 1990, Geoffrey Howe |
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| 17 | CIVILISE | Bring some culture to Channel Islands Elvis impersonator, initially crap CI = Channel Islands; *(Elvis I) |
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| 18 | KINDNESS | Charity gives Brand head KIND = brand (not Jo or Russell); NESS = head |
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| 21 | TUFFET | A certain nursery rhyme miss’s mound? Express disapproval and eff off inside *(eff) in TUT. Little Miss Muffet sat on one, also known as a pouffe. |
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| 22 | RECTAL | Related to the place turning out shit claret (canned) *(claret), with ‘(canned)’ as the anagram indicator. ‘Related to the place turning out shit’ is the definition. What can I say? |
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This week’s joke is a link, for those of you who haven’t seen it yet: Bradley Walsh losing the plot
I had 8 across as Plastery, thinking that you added fibres (pluck) to plaster in the olden days. I now realise I was just a little off the mark with this! However, I too finished this one quite quickly – in a week.
I also had plastery until I couldn’t find it in the dictionary-hadn’t encountered psaltery.
Re 2d, when introduced to his new headmaster by his parents as “our son Master ..” , the headmaster said “Don’t worry, we’ll put a stop to that-make him wear boxing gloves at night”.
Thanks, Jetdoc, for explaining one or two allusions that I hadn’t spotted. Can I raise a query about PROSTATE? Isn’t this an example of the confusion between prostrate, which means lying face down, and supine, which means lying on your back?
Strictly speaking, I think you’re right, Bridgesong. I hadn’t spotted that. Chambers also gives it, more loosely, as ‘lying at length, with the body stretched out; … lying at someone’s mercy; reduced to helplessness; completely exhausted’.